Setbacks = Fail

My options are as follows:

1) Pay $350 to have my ticket put on standby and fly with no money or,
2) Buy a new ticket.

This blows. Unfortunately, no matter how much I rage, I can only blame myself for not getting a proper job back in January.

Motives for why I didn't? Can't really explain that. People ask, I shrug. Mum's asked, Kiran's asked, Chantelle's asked, Jon's asked. Best reason I can come up with is that I feel safer in my head than out, and that's not any reason at all.

So, now I have to start afresh. I'm looking into oversea's temping, because that way I'll go with a job, and will have a better chance of staying there long enough to get my UK Citizenship.

Once I have my citizenship, school is apparently free, or as close to it as you can get. Also, healthcare. Taxes are going to suck, though.

Question, though...do I even want my UK Citizenship? I mean, really...if I'm barely willing to put the effort into going when the plane there is paid for, how fair is it for me to sign up for something like a life-time commitment to another country?

At the same time, I think that if I had defied the gods and gone anyway, this past Monday, things would have turned out nasty.

Still. It stings every time I see a plane go overhead, and every time I think "If I hadn't been such a dumbass, I'd be in Wales right now."